"Absence makes the heart grow fonder but too much absence makes the heart find another."

We're like parallel lines, no matter how near we are to each other, we'll never meet.

Dedicate your music to the people you love,
but if unrequited this love is,
then your dedication is naught
...
but a curse.

All's fair in love and war. 

Am I really over you or am I just trying to live my life without you...

Why is it always easier to confide to a stranger than your own best friend?


My guess is that it is more comfortable and reassuring to let a stranger know your problems and give you advice on something that you think is too embarrassing for your own best friend to know. Ugh, I don't know how to explain it but this is how I think. I tell a stranger, stranger listens and help, I thank stranger and that's the end of confiding the stranger, knowing that I won't be communicating or meeting that stranger ever again. Unlike a best friend who would keep pestering you (out of concern, we all know) about that matter even though you only want to think about it only once. Anyways, no one really wants to feel guilty. So best friends, don't pester me when I don't wish to be pestered. I know you mean well but that's just how I want it to be.

That's how I came to be like this. A win-win situation for all where all is fair in love and war - I don't confide to any strangers or my own best friends but instead, just keep it all bottled up in myself. End product: I close myself up from the world and I become a person so difficult to open up everything that has been unhealthily bottled up. It's eating me from the insides. Argh, how screwed up can I be? I'm stubborn, I don't like to confide to anyone, I'm selfish.

Am I really over you or am I just trying to live my life without you..?


As depressing as it may be, I've been feeding myself with lies after lies and hoping that it would be the former instead of the latter. Who was I kidding? I'm still trying my very best to move along in life without the thought of you overshadowing my life.

I sound pathetic that I feel like eating myself alive. And you're the cause of it all.

Hypophrenia

Hypophrenia - a vague feeling of sadness, seemingly without cause.

Oh, I get that a lot of times.

  You know you really love someone when all you want is for them to be happy, even if that means that you are not a part of it.

'Cause when you fight, you truly find out how much you're willing to take before you break and when you break you need to see if that other person truly cares enough to make everything okay again...

    Amor Deliria Nervosa : 

      The Love Disease.

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.” 

"I want to tell you so badly how I feel, but I'm scared that after I pour out all my feelings for you, you're just going to stare at me like the words don't mean a thing to you. It's amazing when two strangers become the best of friends, but it's sad when the best of friends become two strangers..."

I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, you're probably part of those changes.